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The Sad Clown Paradox

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The state that describes how that a clown 馃ぁ who makes people laugh but still battles depression and anxiety is called 'Sad Clown Paradox'. There's a research that showed many comedians battle with self-esteem and childhood trauma issues. Some very early saw making people laugh as a self-preservation technique in the sense that it can detach them from any adversity faced allowing for perceived control over uncomfortable situations. Whilst they make you laugh, some cry in their rooms. Some even settle for drug and substance abuse. The research further showed that there is an ever-present anxiety amongst comedians that their popularity may disappear tomorrow and hence they may be driven to exhaustion in their work.  Some of them go back home and start pondering why out of everyone who laughed at a joke, one guy right in the front seat didn't laugh.馃槀 It is amazing how your eyes can race past the laughs of many in the room to catch just one person who seem to be uninteres...

Choose one!

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One of the biggest issues in this time and age is 'indecision'. It is becoming increasingly difficult to choose a job, business or a person and commit to it. Social media seems to be painting a world without flaws hence our relentless pursuit. There is the question 'What if I commit to this one and another one comes that is better than this?' Usually, people who think like this.. 1. Lose jobs. The recruiting company has a deadline and may fill the role with someone else who is decisive and chooses them. 2. Lose out on the gains of executing fantastic ideas. Every problem you spot is not peculiar to only your eyes. There are others who have spotted it too. Once you delay because of indecisiveness, someone else who sees the problem and offers himself to solve it, funds to support that decision flow to his direction. 3. Lose out on a person or people. This is common. Soon, the person who is cool seeking for your love and asked you both to be together but you are indecisi...

The First 馃

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Have you noticed that some of your friends you underrated in school because they struggled academically, have good jobs now? Some of the ladies you felt will find it difficult to look attractive to a man because of their color combination when they came for lectures in school and yoruba-garnished accent are happily married with kids now, while you are still actively single struggling to get a good man. Some of the guys and ladies you called unambitious when it had to do with academics but were very entrepreneurial in your university days are now very comfortable doing business internationally. As humans we are quick to judge by what we can see and assume that what is, is all that can be.  We forget that the person you are writing off maybe a job interview away, one scholarship away, one call away from his/her breakthrough. By now, you know that fast people don't always win the race, strong people don't always win the battle and that a person can be smart yet jobless and broke. ...

Palma

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A man had a dog He loved so much. 馃惗 One day, he got a call to travel down from his country to another country to manage a project which would be the biggest project of his career at that time. Given how long he will be staying for the task, he decided to take his dog along with him.  When he got to the airport with his dog, he was asked to present a document that shows that the dog was fit healthwise to fly with him. He quickly left to see a Veterinary Doctor who performed a quick assessment of the dog and told him that the dog wasn't fully well and will need about three days with proper medication to get well.  He persuaded the doctor to please pass his dog fully fit as his flight was taking off in 20 mins.  The doctor didn't bulge one bit.  So this man had the option of either missing his flight to take care of his dog or let the dog go and fly out for a lifetime project to return only God knows when.  He chose to let the dog go albeit with tears in his eyes ...

What Kings Teach Princes

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In the olden days, Kings weekly took out time to teach their young princes the way of life of Kings and the modus operandi of the palace. One of the lessons taught is that money isn't the only tool of transaction but that 'Words are currencies'. The ability to know when, how, who to talk to, where to say it and what to say is one that Kings are made to hone from a very young age.  You must learn not to cheapen your words.  Nothing should leave your tongue without substance.  Even if it's a joke, it should carry a level of substance, weight and dropped at the right time.  When people observe that your words are empty, they will subconsciously put you in a class of those that they shouldn't expect a lot from when you hold the mic.  They will recommend you less for opportunities and close doors by default as they assume you may not represent them well. You can change this perspective although it's hard.  Let me share 8 rules to spend your words like a King....

Scavenger

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 If you expect everyone to be kind, humane and loving sincerely just like you, you are in the wrong planet. Here, when most people find you kind but without boundaries, you will be taught a painful lesson. Here, there are scavengers everywhere seeking to take from what you have (money, energy, efforts, time and joy) and leave you with nothing to figure your way out not caring how you feel. It pains me when I see really kind people get hurt at work, in business and relationship as they haven't learnt how to spot manipulation and leave with supreme peace. Dear Kind people, 1. Learn to have and handle difficult conversations. It doesn't hurt much to have when unsure.  2. Set boundaries. As a businessman, set your price and what amount you can't go below. Guess what? Funny that people love and trust people who have boundaries.  3. No is a statement. Say it when you just can't.... 4. When you notice you are the only one giving and sacrificing, it's wisdom to chill. You d...

Owoh

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Some years ago on LTV, I saw the video of a song by a late artiste that caught my attention. Let me try to retell the story the way I remember it.  He told the story of a man who married his sweetheart馃グ. His first wife died right in the hospital after the delivery of her son that same night.   The man married another wife that same year to stand by his side and to take care of his baby boy. This second wife was so sweet and caring that you will think she gave birth to the boy.  Soon, the second wife gave birth to a boy.  From the day she gave birth to her son, she started plotting the death of the first son.  She got a bottle of poison and waited for a perfect day to execute her plan.  So one day, she prepared two types of porridge. Porridge, again?  Yes, the same that Jacob served Esau馃ぃ She garnished one with different combination of spices, ponmo and vegetables with red oil 馃構.  The other, she didn't add spice and prepared it bare. She se...